alternate realities. my time in Cambodia, thus far, has taught me so much. truth be told, the bites, the dusty roads, the heat in the markets were bearable. but i was constantly looking forward to the day we would go home; back to 'reality'.
we can happily skip on a plane and return to a rather 'posh' lifestyle of not having to worry of mosquitos. turning on the ac with a single button. playing the piano anytime. little, significant details like constant electricity.
the Singaporeans (who started the school) can just hop on a plane too. so can anyone 'serving' in the area. back to a reality where comfort is abundant and, familial faces are not scarce. back to where one train ride will take you to a pristinely clean restaurant. back to a place of no dusty roads. no dirt. apart from the ones designed to be in gardens or sandboxes of children.
that is when it dawned on me. this is their reality. the people i have come to know and love. their reality is here. in the center. away from family. yet, this is the better 'alternate reality'. they are not so different you know. some aspire to be singers, engineers, and scientists. their hopes and dreams are real. but their reality remains. and yet, they are considered blessed to be where they are.
while the comparison is an unprecedented intention, a comparison is only fortuitous. heck, it is necessary.
i have too much, but too much to complain too. shameful but true. my level of gratitude for what i have around me, where i was brought up; it entails a higher level of gratitude than the one i have for life right now. that needs to change. i cannot believe it took a trip to Cambodia for me to realize this. but the unraveling nature of life is as such. i guess.
excerpt from a journal entry: june 25th, 2018
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