spring break 2015 pt 2

Here is a list of some things I got to do over the spring break:

• study & finished all my homework


• Ate cereal (snowflakes) everyday for breakfast


• tan at a nearby pool


• walk around ASU campus (and witness very cold rain - rare occasion)


• hike up camelback


• Drove to Flagstaff


• Visit the beautiful, breath taking Grand Canyon


• Watched Cinderella


• Had a super-good-and-yummy bowl of acai from Chopshop


• Cruised on the lake - with the boat


• Shopped the whole day

So yeah, that was pretty much how I spent my days. Kor was pretty busy but he spent so much time with me nonetheless. Been so blessed to catch up and spend time with this boy.

Your fave chick flick.

Miss you.

x

Your fave chick flick.

Miss you.

x

Thank you, for believing in me;

even from 8725.51 miles away  ت

Thank you, for believing in me;

even from 8725.51 miles away  ت

#557 Irrational,

so my results are just a reflection of how much i've studied. can't say I'm disappointed cause I was too busy getting upset over the brothers' absence.

how unwise is that?

i'm so dumb, please someone just save me.

YES GOD, maybe here's Your que.




IT HAS BEEN 10 DAYS; and skype just wont work. asdfghjlkjg. LIFE. Hits hard.

#557 Irrational,

so my results are just a reflection of how much i've studied. can't say I'm disappointed cause I was too busy getting upset over the brothers' absence.

how unwise is that?

i'm so dumb, please someone just save me.

YES GOD, maybe here's Your que.




IT HAS BEEN 10 DAYS; and skype just wont work. asdfghjlkjg. LIFE. Hits hard.

I cannot lie,

Everyday, my heart simply hopes that he'll come back. Hahha, i like to give false hopes to myself.

I DONT UNDERSTAND.

Our relationship is now internet based. Amazing, well. Life happens right God? Thats okay only cause You're here :)


maybe its time I actually really blogged instead of complaining. So anyways, last weekend, exams ended for us. The following saturday, I tagged along on a last minute trip to Taylors for a crash course. I was so tired, really, maybe cause I had tuition on a friday evening AFTER a whole week of exams. But we decided to go to Pyramid afterwards, mainly cause I wanted to get a present for the baby. Heh, they can't be disappointed by not getting a present on their actual BIRTH DAY, not at this age at least.

So off we were, the bus specially stopped us, hehe. Yeepei, Hafiz, ChunYeaw, Nick and Ching Siang. We went around only to find out MPH relocated, bought a present from Popular nevertheless. Mmm, I am getting very broke, first Tiffany's birthday, then prom, then Samantha's haha. Whats next? Idk, but anyways the guys wanted to go around to look for prom stuff. And we helped them, well sorta, hee, they didn't bring any money though. AND, I never knew guys' shirt could cost so much! Like, in G2000 it was like RM100+ for a shirt. Yes, a plain shirt that you would use to work everyday. Ah so guys have complicated lives too ehhh. Hahah, unless they're like jon and have dad's like ours. haha.

Anyways, it was a good day, to distress after exams. And I didn't realise that exams aren't the only thing that was making me upset yeap. My brothers absence still makes me. :/
Nevertheless, God's plans are perfect:

Proverbs 16:9 
“A man’s heart plans his way, but the Lord directs his steps.” (NIV)

Dear Mr. God,
I'm writing you today because it seems like lately i've forgotten how to pray. I've never really known why You do the things You do, but I believe that all things will work together for good, I just need to trust You more. Its like everything that happens in my life right now, I can't help but blame You, why can't I just understand that you taking Jon to US is part of Your perfect plan? Why can't I understand that not everything that seems perfect to me, is perfect in Your eyes? I really have no idea whats in store ahead for me. But sometimes, when the worlds crashing down on me I'm eternally grateful I have You. People may not understand what I mean by that and why I am such a Christian but I couldn't be bothered. Your love is all I need and that's all that matters. So, thanks for answering me. My replacement brother? It's You huh, it has always been You. So please, help me to set my mind in the right track and use my 45 days wisely God. There's too much to cover and too little time, but You make the impossible; possible. I believe that You will grant me the wisdom and concentration I need.

Thank You for making everything beautiful. For fitting the ugly pieces and perfect memories of my life together, like a puzzle. And thank You for the faith that I've found in You. I know that I miss Jon, and I probably always will, no one can deny that. But the assurance that You're omnipresent, that's wonderful.  Please be the same God you were to Kor while he was onboard the Logos Hope, please be real to him even today.

I know that his heart aches for malaysia. The food specially, haha but dear God, comfort him that he will be reminded of Your perfect plans for him. That he will wake up each day and feel Your love shining down from rays of Arizona sunshine. Help him to always keep his priorities right and to always honor You, and in return You will honor him too.

Thank You for the 16 and a half years we spent together. I'm eternally grateful, that this has taught me to appreciate people more.

In Jesus' name, Amen.

I better stop blogging if i want to finish all my bm homework in school. So, till then,




alright. bye strangers.

I cannot lie,

Everyday, my heart simply hopes that he'll come back. Hahha, i like to give false hopes to myself.

I DONT UNDERSTAND.

Our relationship is now internet based. Amazing, well. Life happens right God? Thats okay only cause You're here :)


maybe its time I actually really blogged instead of complaining. So anyways, last weekend, exams ended for us. The following saturday, I tagged along on a last minute trip to Taylors for a crash course. I was so tired, really, maybe cause I had tuition on a friday evening AFTER a whole week of exams. But we decided to go to Pyramid afterwards, mainly cause I wanted to get a present for the baby. Heh, they can't be disappointed by not getting a present on their actual BIRTH DAY, not at this age at least.

So off we were, the bus specially stopped us, hehe. Yeepei, Hafiz, ChunYeaw, Nick and Ching Siang. We went around only to find out MPH relocated, bought a present from Popular nevertheless. Mmm, I am getting very broke, first Tiffany's birthday, then prom, then Samantha's haha. Whats next? Idk, but anyways the guys wanted to go around to look for prom stuff. And we helped them, well sorta, hee, they didn't bring any money though. AND, I never knew guys' shirt could cost so much! Like, in G2000 it was like RM100+ for a shirt. Yes, a plain shirt that you would use to work everyday. Ah so guys have complicated lives too ehhh. Hahah, unless they're like jon and have dad's like ours. haha.

Anyways, it was a good day, to distress after exams. And I didn't realise that exams aren't the only thing that was making me upset yeap. My brothers absence still makes me. :/
Nevertheless, God's plans are perfect:

Proverbs 16:9 
“A man’s heart plans his way, but the Lord directs his steps.” (NIV)

Dear Mr. God,
I'm writing you today because it seems like lately i've forgotten how to pray. I've never really known why You do the things You do, but I believe that all things will work together for good, I just need to trust You more. Its like everything that happens in my life right now, I can't help but blame You, why can't I just understand that you taking Jon to US is part of Your perfect plan? Why can't I understand that not everything that seems perfect to me, is perfect in Your eyes? I really have no idea whats in store ahead for me. But sometimes, when the worlds crashing down on me I'm eternally grateful I have You. People may not understand what I mean by that and why I am such a Christian but I couldn't be bothered. Your love is all I need and that's all that matters. So, thanks for answering me. My replacement brother? It's You huh, it has always been You. So please, help me to set my mind in the right track and use my 45 days wisely God. There's too much to cover and too little time, but You make the impossible; possible. I believe that You will grant me the wisdom and concentration I need.

Thank You for making everything beautiful. For fitting the ugly pieces and perfect memories of my life together, like a puzzle. And thank You for the faith that I've found in You. I know that I miss Jon, and I probably always will, no one can deny that. But the assurance that You're omnipresent, that's wonderful.  Please be the same God you were to Kor while he was onboard the Logos Hope, please be real to him even today.

I know that his heart aches for malaysia. The food specially, haha but dear God, comfort him that he will be reminded of Your perfect plans for him. That he will wake up each day and feel Your love shining down from rays of Arizona sunshine. Help him to always keep his priorities right and to always honor You, and in return You will honor him too.

Thank You for the 16 and a half years we spent together. I'm eternally grateful, that this has taught me to appreciate people more.

In Jesus' name, Amen.

I better stop blogging if i want to finish all my bm homework in school. So, till then,




alright. bye strangers.

Wishbones,

The furcula, commonly called a wishbone, is the forked,
flexible bone in a bird's breast;
 it is essentially a fusing of the clavicle bones (collarbones)

Yes, so today. I stumbled upon a wishbone. Never knew what it was but Jon has taught me that if it breaks and he gets the piece his wish will come true. Each time, he got it. :( But this time, no one was there to break it with me.

So as you can see, its the littlest things in life that remind me of him. Its like as much as I want to forget and move on, like as if life is normal, things like these will just come and hit right back at me. I really wanna stop missing him. But life is hard, and waay different. Its worse than losing a best friend; and almost like losing a brother.

Do tell me, how does one cope with that?

Till then.

Wishbones,

The furcula, commonly called a wishbone, is the forked,
flexible bone in a bird's breast;
 it is essentially a fusing of the clavicle bones (collarbones)

Yes, so today. I stumbled upon a wishbone. Never knew what it was but Jon has taught me that if it breaks and he gets the piece his wish will come true. Each time, he got it. :( But this time, no one was there to break it with me.

So as you can see, its the littlest things in life that remind me of him. Its like as much as I want to forget and move on, like as if life is normal, things like these will just come and hit right back at me. I really wanna stop missing him. But life is hard, and waay different. Its worse than losing a best friend; and almost like losing a brother.

Do tell me, how does one cope with that?

Till then.

Day 22;

Greetings says perry the playtupus; from the hottest driest state ever;

Someone being in your life, and someone being on your computer screen. Totally different things, I know right! Anyways, things are getting better. Still can't believe how I mad through those 3 weeks. But today kinda sucked, after getting some papers sighs, but I came back to find out that he was waiting for me to come home from school. IDK why but when I saw him and he asked how was I, I just wanted to cry. Make him come home, but that would be stupid. 25 minutes really did good for me I guess. Really helped me get through the rest of the day. Ah.

Anyways Samantha convinced me to get off my study table and go play frisbee with her @ MPSJ. Great time. And i'm convinced that little ballerina is meant for that only, if you get what I mean, she gets tired so easily, that baby. HEH.

Well, overall I really have many things to be grateful for. Specially in the situation I am in. Mum told me that if I think i'm in a crisis, people in Africa have worst.

So I thought of that.

Well, till another exam break? or what nots.

ps/ happy birthday nicholas peanut butter. :)

Day 22;

Greetings says perry the playtupus; from the hottest driest state ever;

Someone being in your life, and someone being on your computer screen. Totally different things, I know right! Anyways, things are getting better. Still can't believe how I mad through those 3 weeks. But today kinda sucked, after getting some papers sighs, but I came back to find out that he was waiting for me to come home from school. IDK why but when I saw him and he asked how was I, I just wanted to cry. Make him come home, but that would be stupid. 25 minutes really did good for me I guess. Really helped me get through the rest of the day. Ah.

Anyways Samantha convinced me to get off my study table and go play frisbee with her @ MPSJ. Great time. And i'm convinced that little ballerina is meant for that only, if you get what I mean, she gets tired so easily, that baby. HEH.

Well, overall I really have many things to be grateful for. Specially in the situation I am in. Mum told me that if I think i'm in a crisis, people in Africa have worst.

So I thought of that.

Well, till another exam break? or what nots.

ps/ happy birthday nicholas peanut butter. :)

82800 seconds left with you,

..and you're making me feel like your friends are more important than me </3

Guess this is good bye then;

best friend, anakin skywalker, retard, pig.

82800 seconds left with you,

..and you're making me feel like your friends are more important than me </3

Guess this is good bye then;

best friend, anakin skywalker, retard, pig.

168 hours;

So it's the fourth day of the eight month already. Thats like two third of our year, over. Just a couple of months more and it's a new year. Time flies faster than anything.

Soon enough you'll have to face things you never wanted. Things have been a blur for me lately. The transition of no more running to 100% studying. Books, books, and more books. Its been some really getting to used to. My leg muscles have shrunk, phases of leg cramps, not getting hungry lately. But thats all physical. I've come to realise that running was actually a part of me that I enjoyed. Despite struggling and having endless training hours; studying is way pressuring. Everyone knowing what they're studying and you're like, whaaat? We actually learned that? And on top of it all. I have to slowly accept the fact that Jon is actually leaving. Yes so. I've been trying to ignore that as a fact; but everything too real to be mere conversations. Conversations were becoming reality. Bags are packed. A "to-do before Jon leaves" was made. I had no choice.

Jon's really leaving. And I keep trying to accept it. But I can't. Reality hits hard when you least expect it. True indeed.

I've been really preoccupied with my thoughts lately. I struggle a lot. When i'm studying I think too much. When I sleep I think too much. When i'm with my family I get to emotional; be it getting angry easily, or being too sensitive. I break down all the time. INFRONT OF THEM. Which really embarrassing, but i've stopped. At least these few days. AND THE WORST THING IS I REALLY DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO. I get so helpless. I mean, everyone in that family is coping with their own way of letting him go too. But he has always been someone really close to me in the family. We stand up for each other, grew up together doing all sorts of silly things. Despite growing up. We've got closer in other ways. He really talks sense into me when I lose myself. He's honest. And the only sibling I can turn to; being the second. SIGHS THING IS. Everything is going to change. I really don't get why he can't leave AFTER SPM, not before, but well. God's plans are perfect. No denying that. He'll help me cope with all this. I believe. I really really don't like where I am now. Its like when  I study, all I think about is how many days we have left before he leaves. I mean I know its gonna be just 3 years. But 3 years can do a lot for someone. I might even get back a totally different brother. AND THE USA IS SO FAR. Its not like he can come back anytime he wants. Whats worse is that, I don't know how to act around him. Mum says make him feel loved and appreciated before he leaves, but I choose to ignore the fact that he's leaving. I mean, till now, I have yet to say anything like "I'll miss you" and all, we just joke about it. Well. Guess I need to stop talking to myself and start sorting things out. But this I know for now, I really don't want to study. I just do it cause Mum and Dad are checking in on me. And I hate myself for being crazily over emotional. I hate it. I need to let go. Cast all my worries down before the cross. Just cause Jesus has been through so much worse & that He understands.

168 hours till he leaves and 2184 hours left to SPM. Despite everything. I have to surrender everything i'm feeling right now. Only because I believe deep inside, that all His ways are perfect.

____

God’s way is perfect.
    All the Lord’s promises prove true.
    He is a shield for all who look to him for protection.
Psalms 18:30

Till then,

CHONG WEI vs. ugly moustache LIN DAN now

168 hours;

So it's the fourth day of the eight month already. Thats like two third of our year, over. Just a couple of months more and it's a new year. Time flies faster than anything.

Soon enough you'll have to face things you never wanted. Things have been a blur for me lately. The transition of no more running to 100% studying. Books, books, and more books. Its been some really getting to used to. My leg muscles have shrunk, phases of leg cramps, not getting hungry lately. But thats all physical. I've come to realise that running was actually a part of me that I enjoyed. Despite struggling and having endless training hours; studying is way pressuring. Everyone knowing what they're studying and you're like, whaaat? We actually learned that? And on top of it all. I have to slowly accept the fact that Jon is actually leaving. Yes so. I've been trying to ignore that as a fact; but everything too real to be mere conversations. Conversations were becoming reality. Bags are packed. A "to-do before Jon leaves" was made. I had no choice.

Jon's really leaving. And I keep trying to accept it. But I can't. Reality hits hard when you least expect it. True indeed.

I've been really preoccupied with my thoughts lately. I struggle a lot. When i'm studying I think too much. When I sleep I think too much. When i'm with my family I get to emotional; be it getting angry easily, or being too sensitive. I break down all the time. INFRONT OF THEM. Which really embarrassing, but i've stopped. At least these few days. AND THE WORST THING IS I REALLY DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO. I get so helpless. I mean, everyone in that family is coping with their own way of letting him go too. But he has always been someone really close to me in the family. We stand up for each other, grew up together doing all sorts of silly things. Despite growing up. We've got closer in other ways. He really talks sense into me when I lose myself. He's honest. And the only sibling I can turn to; being the second. SIGHS THING IS. Everything is going to change. I really don't get why he can't leave AFTER SPM, not before, but well. God's plans are perfect. No denying that. He'll help me cope with all this. I believe. I really really don't like where I am now. Its like when  I study, all I think about is how many days we have left before he leaves. I mean I know its gonna be just 3 years. But 3 years can do a lot for someone. I might even get back a totally different brother. AND THE USA IS SO FAR. Its not like he can come back anytime he wants. Whats worse is that, I don't know how to act around him. Mum says make him feel loved and appreciated before he leaves, but I choose to ignore the fact that he's leaving. I mean, till now, I have yet to say anything like "I'll miss you" and all, we just joke about it. Well. Guess I need to stop talking to myself and start sorting things out. But this I know for now, I really don't want to study. I just do it cause Mum and Dad are checking in on me. And I hate myself for being crazily over emotional. I hate it. I need to let go. Cast all my worries down before the cross. Just cause Jesus has been through so much worse & that He understands.

168 hours till he leaves and 2184 hours left to SPM. Despite everything. I have to surrender everything i'm feeling right now. Only because I believe deep inside, that all His ways are perfect.

____

God’s way is perfect.
    All the Lord’s promises prove true.
    He is a shield for all who look to him for protection.
Psalms 18:30

Till then,

CHONG WEI vs. ugly moustache LIN DAN now

#524

I planned to skip school today so I could study at home. Turns out, I actually fell sick :( Plans gone wrong, I slept my whole morning with a fever + flu. Greaaat. Attempts to study with a massive headache wasn't that bad, rarely falling asleep, thanks to jia who told me sour stuff keeps you awake, not coffee. So that was the only plus for today I guess. Lil sister kept my mood up today. OH. She said I could eat her today when I threatened to bite her. That was disturbing hahaha. She's up there laughing over some cartoon now. Love her to the bits. At least she's not leaving to US. But still, Jon leaving is something I really don't know how to face. For now. He's here. Just for now.

____

Philippians 4:13

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

2 Corinthians 9:8
8 And God is able to bless you abundantly, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work.

Ephesians 3:20-21
20 Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, 21 to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.

Today's New International Version (TNIV)

#524

I planned to skip school today so I could study at home. Turns out, I actually fell sick :( Plans gone wrong, I slept my whole morning with a fever + flu. Greaaat. Attempts to study with a massive headache wasn't that bad, rarely falling asleep, thanks to jia who told me sour stuff keeps you awake, not coffee. So that was the only plus for today I guess. Lil sister kept my mood up today. OH. She said I could eat her today when I threatened to bite her. That was disturbing hahaha. She's up there laughing over some cartoon now. Love her to the bits. At least she's not leaving to US. But still, Jon leaving is something I really don't know how to face. For now. He's here. Just for now.

____

Philippians 4:13

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

2 Corinthians 9:8
8 And God is able to bless you abundantly, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work.

Ephesians 3:20-21
20 Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, 21 to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.

Today's New International Version (TNIV)

Petaling Nombor Satu,

I shall remember this; for a long time.

Jon's sharing in church tomorrow. Its quite amazing how much he's changed since being back from the LOGOS Hope, God is working in him. Heh, I trust you for wherever he goes next God.

MSSS, over, school now :)

till then,

:/