Thoughts

let me tell you a story.

This past week has been so difficult for me because I've had to face things no girl should ever face. Okay fine, this may sound melodramatic, I'll stop.

But let me tell you, before I start, that if you can relate to this, you should know that you can come to a place that is set higher and chose to speak life and peace into your circumstances.

So, a friend told me that I could live with her for the summer. It wasn't till later on that I found out that the person will not be in town till a week or so after my contract ended. Ok, so whatever, cause someone offered me their couch. And that was enough. Somehow deep inside I had a feeling that it wouldn't work out. And so Sunday came along, I had no place to go. I called my cell leader just hours before, explained my situation and she said I could stay. So that was that. 

I've been trying to call the person to see if I still could live with her for the rest of the summer. But somehow I just felt like, meh. It didn't work out, why should I keep trying. I was upset already. Because let me tell you something:

Being homeless sucks. Depending on others sucks. Relying on someone else (other than family) it's not cool. Always asking for rides and favours you know you cannot repay. 

To be honest I wasn't even pms-ing. I guess the feeling of not having a place to stay in a foreign land really got to me. I don't even know why.. But whatever the excuse, I was sad. Feeling so let down. Not cool I tell you. On top of that I kept missing Skype or FaceTime dates. 

Let me where I am at now. This past Sunday I went out for prayers, and whatever pride I had I didn't care. I just went out and told my frustrations, basically how I wished I was home - and things would be less complicated. I literally bawled. Which was a little bit embarrassing but no pride hey. Through that prayer, I felt my heavy heart slowly becoming lighter and lighter. By the time I got back to my seat I was so light. I felt free and it has been quite some time since I felt that way.

To be honest, I purposed in my heart to forgive, forget and let it be the past. But honestly, let me be frank and tell you that my initial trust can never be restored. I guess I really just need Jesus to teach me how to trust and start new again. 
I mean one step at a time? I am so grateful that I got to a point where I can look at the situation from a higher point. I am blessed to be able to stand on a rock that is higher than I. I pray with all my heart that I will be able to be genuine and loving and just so forgiving in future circumstances.
Here's to new family and learning to grow!

Summer livin

i have a tonne of things to check of my to-do list,

But all I can do right now is just sit here, listen to Sleeping at Last aka emo music, stare out into the night and think of how cool it would be if I could be in AZ.
Ah that life of disappointment is a stranger to me now.

Because if you learn to rely on the One that never fails - life will never be a disappointment.

Grateful for alone time and grateful for my best best Friend who follows me wherever I go.
Remember that, Eugenia.

Kendra turns 19





Today would not have happened without:

German Chocolate cupcakes - courtesy of Crimson and Cream (so good)

Laura - brought party hats for everyone and a tiara for the Birthday girl! :)

Last but not least - mastermind behind everything. Nosi! She planned and made tonight happened. So blessed and thankful for this year wonderful lady ❤️


This is Kendra. I met her barely 3 months ago but I love her so much already. In many ways she has been such a blessing to me. She has been like my "little" sister - no I'm kidding. But her love for God inspires to always pursue God with all my heart.
From my brief friendship with Kendra I can say this about her.
Kendra is kind, she is determined- to love God and love others. Kendra is full of joy and caring. But most of all Kendra's child like faith and love for God is extraordinary.
Happy 19th birthday, to this wonderful life I have a privilege to be a part of.
Love you Kendra Sy!

Phenomenal

(photo credits: theworshipproject.co)

so I just had to blog. It's 230am and I just had IHOP for the first time! Yeah Murica. Also, I've just had the best day yet. 

Started off the day asking God for favor when we met with the bursar to try to waive our late charges. After class I headed over and kept asking God for favor. True enough when we met with Miss Janice, she immediately waived the charges and got our receipts in a second. I barely needed to explain why I needed the charges waived. I was so happy and shocked at how smooth the whole process went. Finally being able to pay fees was a huge relief off of my back. And on top of that, in faith I went to the bank the day before and took out the exact balance without the extra 1.5% and if they didn't waive it I would have to make another trip to Chase. Wow.

Then I went to the bookstore and got a shirt that was wrongly priced - but I got it for the cheaper price anyways! :) :)

But to top it all off - Encounter tonight was PHENOMENAL. No other word to describe what just happened. We spent the few hours soaking, prophesying and ministering into each other. Oh so powerful. God keeps reminding me how He has taken care of me throughout my high school/running days and He'll do the same here. Afterwards Rin and Chad prayed over me. Rin got a word for me about being a bright fire and Chad had a funny picture of me cupping water in my palms. Hmm I have to pray about that for sure. But man oh man.

It gets better.

I got to play foosball with the awesome bunch. And while that was happening, everyone was buzzing on about IHOP (cause international pancake day!). Then suddenly, OU texted/called that classes were cancelled for the whole of today!!!! Which means tests are going to be rescheduled but yay!!

So IHOP was a no go. Headed over to Hannah's to grab her laptop and some coffee. Then we went to the house Joel and Jarred stayed for a week / house sitting to have worship. Man! Greg was there too. It was so awesome. The word spoken over the group tonight:

• We are going to be excellent in sharing Gods love
• People are going to want to be near us and we are gonna make an impact on campus
• Greg said that worship was like the 7th walk around Jericho. We didn't need to do anything yet the walls broke down. All we needed was to praise Him.

Encounter and worship afterwards - was indescribable. God came down and poured out into so many hungry hearts today - surreal.

We did IHOP! And hence why I'm just writing this now. :) pancakes was good.

I'm so excited that good days like these are going to be a norm - and I'm claiming that. More favored days ahead!! :) :) 

So thank You Jesus. For you tell us to worry not and rest in You. We know every good and wonderful thing comes from You alone. Lest we forget.

Tests

I know I was suppose to blog about fullness but I'm feeling so bummed. Test results are coming in and I totally flunked two of my major courses - it's not that I didn't study or anything cause I really did! Yet I just either don't understand what I'm doing, or I figured it out but don't get it when questions are changed.

Funny thing is, I went to the action center for physics and this dude who never took Physics his whole life - who doesn't know how to calculate acceleration from a graph - yeah we he totally scored way higher than mine. Like how is that even possible?

Seriously don't know what's happening. I need to study smart, but I don't know how.

But God turns around the worst situations for the best - so there is my silver lining.

Oh the irony of resting that I learned in fullness: to let go and let God, but sometimes all I can see is everything else that God doesn't. So today I'm going to declare that my grades do not define me. Especially not a test grade. It will not limit or stop me from ace-ing my final exams and future tests. Today onwards I will study smart - even if I don't know how, the Holy Spirit will be my teacher.


Grace days - endured.

Fullness 2015

Hi, its Friday and I am waiting on laundry. I am listening to Jonathan David & Melissa Helser's latest album - "On the Shores". I just scored 5/5 for my Geo reading quiz and that made my day. :) Anyway, I've been procrastinating. Putting off writing this post and now I realise why. Why I wasn't so keen on writing it.

Honestly, the Fullness conference tugs on my heart's deepest part. Every fault and disbelief I have was challenged. I will try to explain what I mean. But honestly, I am a very negative person (well that was the old me!) and to hear things like this - the simple truths of our great Father made me so skeptical. I was like, "Huh, really, it's that simple? No, that can't be it".

One thing spoke to me so powerfully - this simple statement:

"Rest is our greatest weapon"

As easy as it is to say these five words, to know and take heart, thats a different level. Graham Cooke's sermon on rest really challenged me. I started questioning myself. Really - why am I worrying so much when I have a God that has everything taken care of? Is anything too hard for the Lord? Often, I am guilty of belittling God. Limiting His power and love in my life. Honestly, we receive the love we think we receive and I've been guilty of thinking that God will never love me as much because of (endless list of flaws). Telling Him, "Hey, my day is going to be pretty busy today, and I'm going to pray and do my devotions - but I'm going to strive to make sure I get through the day. And uhm, if you want to help you can, but it's going to be a busy day, okay God? So bye", "See you when I'm exhausted and weary from my busy day". And then at the end of the day I find myself asking, "Where was God during my bad/busy days"? Naive. So blinded by the fact that i've left Him aside, forgotten that He was right there, next to me.

And yet, God is so ever ready to open His arms wide again - to assure me that He is glad i've come to realise that his love is unconditional. His grace is all deserving and His power knows no bounds. And yes, we may limit Him when the waves of life come crashing Him, but that doesn't mean He is actually limited in anything, we just think He is. And oh, what a wonderful God we serve. That allows us to come just as we are, with our flaws and impure love and filthy hearts.

I will never begin to understand that, but I believe it is real. And I want to live like that - knowing I am loved and God's grace will never let  me go. I went to lifegroup on Thursday (after yet another hectic week) and Chris, my LG leader shared about how he had a pretty intense week but He chose Jesus. He chose not to worry. In the end he didn't look tired out or anything, God's grace sustained him. Wow, to hear and witness testimonies from people my age - that's something. LG has been opening my eyes to see how God works in the lives of people my age. I've heard testimonies after testimonies. Jesus has worked in radical ways. Despite the similar struggles we all face as students, God remains the same, yet so personal to each and everyone of us. I want a significant relationship with God. One thats not built based on obligations but one that recognizes that by delighting in God alone, we claim our territory and let God into our everyday lives. Better yet, we kick the enemy's stronghold, throw away worries and anxieties. Before we know it, we have our greatest weapon: REST!

And a little bit about the actual conference. The Friday of the conference Kenah texted me. He told me that he had extra overflow tickets - a ticket cost $69 (overflow) $90 (normal). And I thought about it for the longest time, then I finally decided, hey, he offered, guess I'll just go. And so, I am so grateful to Kenah really, for not forcing us, but actually giving us the option to go. Thankful to these two really. They treat me like their own little sister. Love them to the bits (picture 8) I got to hang out at Hannah's place for the night with a bunch of girls from LG. One of them, Rachel (picture 7) is an art/portrait major. Its so cool how she painted during worship, the picture shows some of the paintings she worked on throughout fullness. (picture 5&6) This super cool burger/bar place Kenah took us. He paid for our burgers, it was so good! The place was pretty neat too. We spent the break talking and getting to know Laura. (picture 1) is on Saturday - when Kenah cooked for us dinner and we all hung out at his place.

So, the picture with the Bethel guys? Well. I totally had a crush on the keyboardist, haha he was so good looking! And on the last day I told myself I need a picture with him, or anyone in the band for Tiff (< super big fan of Bethel). But I had not guts. Ya. I went up to the beard guy , told him my sister is singing Bethel songs in Malaysia. And there, awkward picture for you! I was kinda bummed since they were leaving for tour immediately after this service. We chilled and waited for everyone to gather to go home. And I was heading towards the toilet area when Jeremy Riddle and Mr Cute Keyboardist walked towards me!!! I was thrilled. Totally jumped at the chance and asked for a picture. Conveniently, Pabel was there and the Cutie thought I wanted a picture with Jeremy only, I had to convince him to be in it lol. But it was all worth it! We drove home and they were next to us. It wa so funny but :) :) what a wonderful few days. really.


(1)

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(3) :)

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(5)(6)(7)

(8)

Thank you Jesus, for never failing to amaze each day.

I had 3 meals today. This is historic, this deserves a post.

OU

Unedited pictures. Since day 1! :)

2am

Well hello,

Here I am after hours of physics. I was so worked up over it I just had to de-stress. And so I watched a movie. And now here I am.

Here is a little update about "life in OU" lol. 3 weeks into the semester and we are going to have our first round of exams. It's not that bad since the mid semester examinations are looming. So it's just studying non stop - that is not bad, right?

Well I don't know. Depending on personal preference I would say.

Anyway, the thing is that sometimes I keep forgetting where I am. Literally, I would finish homework, wake up in the morning, or be walking down the street and realize that hey, where am I? I'm not home, I'm in OU now, studying. This is so weird. Having to constantly remind myself. Oh well.

Life here is starting to settle down. Next week will be my first official month so that's that for now. Till then!

Here's a Bible verse I found today, for one to live this out would be amazing:
Colossians 1:10
"So that you may live a life worth of the Lord and please him in every way, bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God."

3 things to know about making a USA Student Visa

Visas can be a difficult painful process if not done carefully. However, instructions are clearly posted on their website and I found this video online - posted by the embassy itself. It's pretty helpful to  briefly understand the process. So here is a mini list to ensure your interview day goes as planned.

1. Prepare your documents before the actual day.

• List of documents needed here

For students an additional document is the I-20 form. Ensure that all sections are signed (for mine there was a section for myself - the student and a section for a parent/guardian).

"Once your visa appointment is over, make sure you photocopy every important piece of paper, or scan and save all of your forms to a hard drive.

Losing any piece of visa paperwork can land you in a mess, but the process of fixing that problem will be made marginally easier if you have at least one backup copy of all of your required forms. Keep everything together in a big folder, save copies on a hard drive and, of course, try not to lose any of the originals." (source)

2. Find out the address of the USA embassy in Malaysia - if you are not familiar already KL roads can be very congested during rush hour. Try to leave as early as possible if you are travelling from outside KL town.
[googlemaps https://www.google.com/maps/embed?pb=!1m14!1m8!1m3!1d3983.771245030069!2d101.72250000000001!3d3.1549220000000004!3m2!1i1024!2i768!4f13.1!3m3!1m2!1s0x31cc37ccb3d75de5%3A0x35ef9bae897fc68d!2sUS+Commercial+Service%2C+US+Embassy!5e0!3m2!1sen!2s!4v1417143417545&w=400&h=300]

US Commercial Service, US Embassy

376, Jalan Tun Razak

50400 Kuala Lumpur

Wilayah Persekutuan Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia

Opening hours: 8:00 am – 4:30 pm

malaysia.usembassy.gov

+60 3-2168 5000

3. Be prepared to wait - or not to. Every applicant has to go through a different waiting time. If you're easily restless - don't forget to bring some form of entertainment, puzzles, crosswords etc. because you will not be allowed to bring a mobile device into the premises.

---

My interview day:

So I was instructed to arrive only 10 minutes earlier than the time stated (0850 hrs). However, when I arrived people were already queuing up so the guard informed me that those with the 0850 appointment can line up already.

1. Handed in my appointment confirmation paper & my IC in exchange for a green visa pass.

2. We had to go through a security check point. Handphones are to be left at this check point. The guard will ask you to write down your details and give you a Number Card so don't worry about bringing a hand phone. You can collect it after your interview at the EXIT counter. If you're really paranoid you should just leave it behind.

3. Inside, a guard will give you a waiting number (this is given according to your category - student VISA is categorised A) and a green sheet of paper to inform you what documents you need to submit. You are given time - a short waiting period to prepare the following documents for submission:

• appointment confirmation letter


• DS-160 confirmation page


• current passport


• the green sheet of paper


• VISA 2x2 photo (white background)

The process includes 3 steps:

1. Documentation


2. Biometrics


3. Interview

Documentation: Your number will be called and someone will check and receive your documents at the counter. (You go back and wait again for your number to be called)

Biometrics: Again, your number will be called. This time you will be scanning your finger prints. First - four fingers (excluding thumb) left hand. Then, right hand also four fingers. Finally both thumbs together. They will check your prints immediately - if it is fine you may leave. (You go back and wait again for your number to be called)

Interview: 
So I got interviewed by a really nice lady. Our conversation went somewhat like this:
Me: Good morning.
Lady: Hi morning, so why are you going to the USA?
Me: I'm going there to study.
Lady: What was your last school/college?
*Hands in Foundation certificate, IELTS results, Shell sponsor letter (with financial statement), and OU offer
Me: I finished my foundation last December, I took a gap year.
*Lady looks away from computer, looks at me.
Lady: Oh really? Why did you take a gap year?
Me: I was applying for a scholarship - I am sponsored by Shell Malaysia *points to Shell letter
Lady: Oh really?? (At this point she was so excited) That's so cool, so how much are they paying? Are they covering all your fees?
Me: Yeah, they are please look at the last page, all the financial details are there.
Lady: Wow, that is so cool. Was it hard?? To get the scholarship? What did you have to do?
Me: Yea it wasn't easy. We had to go through three stages (and I talked a little bit, I don't know why I was feeling nervous but I didn't say much lol)
Lady: Cool, so you are studying Petroleum Engineering. How many ladies are in this field?
Me: Uhmm, I'm not very sure, but if I'm not mistaken there are three of us going overseas.
Lady: Oh, I see, cause you don't find a lot of ladies doing this nowadays. Do you have any family members or relatives in the US?
Me: Yeah, I have a brother in Arizona State University.
Lady: And is he sponsored like you too?
Me: Nah, my Dad is sponsoring him.
Lady: So your Dad must be really happy you're getting this huh? Well all the best and congratulations you've passed the interview. Your visa will be sent to your address within two working days.
Me: Alright, thank you! Have a nice day!
Lady: You too!

So the lady was really really nice. She's probably only 20 something. Anyways, this happened on a Friday. The next week on Tuesday I received my passport from Aramex. The courier they use. So everything was settled in three working days.

Thats it for now! Wrote this post way on Friday itself but I couldn't find time to post it till now lol. Ok. Till then!

Malaysian applying to study in the USA (without an AUP / ADP / A Levels) part 2

Hi again! Here are more details and the icky bits:

Information for international applications - since every university has already set their own information for international applicants on their website I will spare you the details and share with you the problems I encountered.

1. NAME - Yes. Your name. Asians have Christian names, Chinese names, A/L, Anak and etc. But regardless of what people call you - ALWAYS register with the name registered in your IC. I know you may think like, duh, we also know. This is for all those with names like mine, with Anak, A/P, A/L. Be extra careful. Sometimes I accidentally write my name that is not the one stated in my IC. Ensure ALL documents are all under the same name. The US are generally very strict on this.

2. Official results - so if you have read earlier I plan to leave in July. My IELTS was scheduled on 5th May. They offered to send my results to 5 uni/institutions for free however by that time I didn't know I was applying to US. I didn't send any. I had to contact the institution to inform then and pay an extra charge of MYR 130 per results sent. Hence, plan ahead. To ensure it arrives safely, ask the institution for the tracking number and constantly correspond to ensure your status on the application portal is updated.

3. Unit Outlines - so I took a foundation course earlier and in order to transfer my credit hours they needed to see my unit outlines. Remember to keep all your unit outlines if you're planning to transfer! It was hard to find it all again (because my google Drive got wiped out - my laptop can't read USBs kinda my fault) but I got it in the end :)

4. Extra official documents - if you are in my shoes. Trying to apply with a non ADP/AUP/A levels program, you will need official certificates available to be sent. Yes, the original one. I had to buy five extra sets from Swinburne - it wasn't the cost it was the time. It took at least 7 plus working days. So remember to get extra if you're planning to transfer!

5. Freshman/Transfer?
Correct me if i'm wrong here but most people i've asked have advised me to settle for Freshman year instead of transferring 11 credit hours. I know it may seem like a lot, but repeating first year again will be a bonus to your final CGPA. You'll do well (according to a senior) and at the end you'll graduate with an excellent CGPA. If you're like me you may be thinking not being able to transfer your hours may be a waste of your foundation studies. I agree. But just be open to other possibilities. In the event that your application for a transfer is not possible, you should request to apply as a freshman. Go seek advice from peers or seniors, but most importantly be open. By then you'll be able to decide easily.

Malaysian Applying to study in the USA (without an AUP / ADP / A Levels) part 1

Hello! :)

I've recently successfully applied to universities in the United States. Frankly, applying and being accepted into a university in Australia and UK, I have to say that the US system varies in many ways. Anyway, here is a short list of things you should know about applying to study in the states:

1. It can be very costly.
2. In USA, every university has their own requirements.
3. Timezones
4. Time



1. It can be very costly.
For an international student, most universities charge an application fee of $90.00 ($90 x 3.3 = MYR297). So if you want to keep your options open its MYR297 x (no. of options).

Next, you will need a proof of English Language Proficiency. This may vary depending on what exam you took or choose to take. For me I took the IELTS and it cost around MYR600.

Also, postage. Mailing official documents can be costly. However the cheapest option i've found so far is the local post - Pos Laju Malaysia. An envelope with the required documents will cost MYR 81.25. This cost covers insurance, tracking number and is basically quite reliable. The documents will arrive within 3 to 7 working days. So again, for more options, sending documents to different universities will cost MYR 81.25 x (no. of options).

SAT/ACT requirement, $51.00 ($51.00 x 3.3 = MYR 168.30) I don't know if anyone got in without sitting for this. Do tell me if you do, but sitting for either one of these tests allows you to avoid hassles and complications of you application.

Medical check up - This is only required after you are admitted. But I am pretty confident that most of you guys will get into a uni. So it is better to do it earlier. Get it out of the way so you can settle other things. The jabs are around MYR150 and the x-ray for TB can cost around MYR45 or more (depending on your Dr). Total: MYR 195.00. Basically you need at least two hundred to ensure you fulfil their requirements.

AFTER accepting the offer:

•  you will receive your I-20 to apply for a VISA.


• you will be able to apply for housing (most unis charge a fee to apply for a contract - again this is general and does not apply to all universities)

Visa -
SEVIS fee: $200 x 3.3 = MYR 660
VISA fee: $160 x 3.30 = MYR 528
Total:                            MYR 1188

Housing fee -
$40 x 3.3 = MYR 132

Estimated total for applying to two schools:
APPLICATION FEE:              MYR 594       ( 297 x 2 options )
IELTS:                                         MYR 600
POSTAGE:                                MYR 162.50 ( 81.25 x 2 options )
SAT:                                             MYR 168.30
MEDICAL CHECK UP:          MYR 200.00
VISA:                                          MYR 1188.00
HOUSING FEE:                       MYR 132.00       
TOTAL:                                     MYR 3044.80

I have not considered everything in these brief paragraphs. This is merely a rough estimate - so hopefully it will help. As we can all see, it adds up to a pretty hefty sum! (Yes i'm broke now, thanks Dad for paying the rest)

2. In USA, every uni has their own requirements.
Although somewhat similar, some universities may vary in certain aspects. For example, one of my options was University of Texas, (UT) Austin. While the other unis requested for official hard copies of academic records, UT wanted it in PDF form - uploaded into their system.

Be very careful. I wasn't aware earlier, but fortunately I managed to upload my documents.

3. Timezones
So the USA has a timezone that is entirely different than in Malaysia. Be aware of that when corresponding with the university admissions board. Depending on which timezone you are planning to apply to but generally evening onwards our time would be their opening hours. So be prepared for late nights!

4. Time
Yes time. The earlier you apply the better. Give yourself time for unexpected delays and what not - being continents away it is only convenient to do so. If you are considering studying inhttp://sat.collegeboard.org/, you should look into the intakes immediately. Start your application as soon as you are sure you are leaving! The best is 6 months. However I manage to settle mine in around 2 months - so it is still possible but MAN it was so hectic and rushed! Nobody likes to rush, so plan ahead!

I hope you have a brief perception of what you have to do/prepare when applying for a University in US. I wish you all the best when applying. I hope you get into a school you want!

Till then! Part two here.

782

I finally got my admissions pack. Headed to OU soon. So this is for everyone who believed in me right from the start:

Thank you to my family, who believed in me throughout this whole period. For encouraging me, allowing me to remain positive, and for always being there.

Dad - more than the money. For always checking up on my application. Your concern meant a lot.

For aunties and uncles who've prayed for me, Dad's cell group, and concerned friends who are always checking with Ma and Dad about my applications. Appreciate it.

For friends who remind me to be grateful and hopeful.

Most importantly, to the person up there smiling down and watching over me through everything. Nothing would have been possible if I didn't trust Him. What a journey eh? But really, thank you Jesus. :)

Phew, what a relief.

Will write a post soon about applying once everything is settled
(Because blogs have helped me out so so much, I hope my experience will benefit someone one day) but till then!

Ordinary

So what have I been up to lately? I must say having a journal really kills the joy of blogging. Public posts are not suitable for fully expressive thoughts, but still. Btw, I must confess again I don't re-read my old journals.

Anyhow! A little updates on my application. Earlier, I wrote about how my plans have changed and that I am officially taking the whole year off from educational pursuit. (Lol, I know you're secretly judging me for wasting my life, so read the post okay, I have my reasons). As of today, I've applied to four universities in the States. Two of them are top 75 in the world for general engineering, but all four are top in the States for Petroleum Engineering. So more choices for me! I've made up my mind on where I want to go. Just waiting for my offers now.

Oh yes. The wait. Is. So. Torturing. Really, I need my I-20 papers asap to apply for my visa interview. As much as I loathe waiting, time seems to be flying by. How ironic, but let me remind you, there are only 45 days till the brother comes home, 53 days to Christmas, 64 days till I leave!

So much left to do. So much to pack. So many people to meet.

I'll update once I get my offers :) But before it all that starts, I would like to talk to you about a book. My favourite one.

---

I admit I'm not the holiest person, however I love reading Psalms. Its a book in the Bible. Sometimes I become too selfish and just read Psalms all the time haha, but really. When I feel down or upset. There are verses to lift my spirits. Often, I stumble upon verses that means so much to me. Undeniably, every Christian loves the Psalms, and I am not excused.

One of the verses on my app is:

 The Lord is close to all who call on Him,
    yes, to all who call on Him in truth.
 He grants the desires of those who fear Him;
    he hears their cries for help and rescues them.

Psalms 145:18-19 (NLT)

Over the past few years, I've came to know God in a very personal way. Today, I still hold fast to my beliefs because He never fails me. Really. I have no idea how many times I've drifted away from God. And yet every single time, He looks out for me and continually shows me how much He loves me. So overwhelming. I can't deny His love anymore. I've decided to believe in Him because He never leaves me through it all. Whenever you call, He's always there. He'll bring us out of any sticky situation. This ordinary life we have been given. So dull. Yet He cares. For every single detail.

I am still unsure where I will be next year. Plans are plans. But of this one thing I'm sure: My God never fails.

It is November already! Eleven months have passed, now go ask yourself how did you spend the last 10 months.

Till then! :) #np

#616

Another wave of sadness again. Yeap you realise I end up blogging when I feel so overwhelmed. Lacking faith in my future indirectly shows how much I have faith in God. Since He already knows my whole story; I am so disappointed I cannot trust Him enough. SIGHS.


My comfort today:

Philippians 4:6
New King James Version (NKJV)
Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God;


Favourite verse, I just wish I had the heart to take it and live it.

Dear God,
Please grant me strength to believe in the things unseen, hope for the things already prepared for me and trust / delight in You always. Uni applications and scholarship may just be a speck of what You already have in store for me. I know You have marvellous, unthinkable plans for my life. Right now I choose to believe and trust that Your timing is the best and that your plans for the future are of good and not of evil, to give me a future. Love you, forever and always.



From Kampung Speu, Cambodia