So.

This morning was very eventful. We went to town this morning for  kopitiam and it was amazing as usual. And the eggs so perfectly boiled. On the way we also got a new case for our fave (aging) DSLR. The price was surprisingly reasonable - one if the reasons we love KL.
Afterwards me and Dad even manage to vacuum the cars before it got hot. Such a productive morning :)

Oh but sadly, the brother has not been replying my messages for weeks now. And to think that he had just Skype with dad yesterday. Ughh this means so much catching up to do when we talk again.

Till then everyone! Kinda out of quotes for now. Too lazy.

---

So sick of everyone asking why I am not back home in my kampung. Dad won't let me go but he won't keep quiet about it either. Way to rub salt into its wound Dad. Seriously so edgy today. But nevertheless Thank You God for tomorrow. For all the blessings you've poured on the Ibans. And to those celebrating,

Selamat Ari Gawai!

---

 I know that there is nothing better for people than to be happy and to do good while they live.

―Ecclesiastes 3:12

Gawai in two days yo

Hello, today is another fairly good day.

I got to see a Kuching face. Went for lunch with Linus today. Parking was a headache but it was worth it. Talking to kuching people again.. Oh, the 400m results are out and the new champ hails from Terengganu. She timed a record breaking time of 54.47 seconds. Congratulations to Siti Nur Afiqah!

If I ran my PB (considering that I can still perform) I would come in 7th. LOL. OHWELL. Now that Kanna, Kah Lin and I are no longer running none of the Selangor runners made it too finals. Ah but they were so close.

To those celebrating, Selamat Ari Gawai in advance.

Till then!

Roadtrippin' 2014

This morning, after sending off my application Mom decided to take us somewhere(since it is the holidays). So I drove us all to a nearby state - Malacca. It was Samantha's first time seeing the sights. She has been there plenty of times; but only in hotels. Well, here are some of my favourite shots. Took more but I am just too tired. So this will suffice, I am sorry if you don't like the colour but I love the temperature in the edits. Heh.

Famous Malacca Cendol

Amsterdam in Malaysia?

Shot by the baby sister - haha I like it despite the exposure

Another of my fave shots - only changed the colour.

Thats it for now. My legs felt better. So healthy and okay with walking around for almost three hours. God is good. Today was a good day. :)

What next?

Twitter is flooded.... with pictures of my best buds heading to SUKMA. I will be praying and hoping for the best for every athlete. It is time to over throne Terengganu and get first guys! Selangor nombor satu selamanya k. Haha, and if you are wondering. Yes I am certain my running days are sort of over, I mean for SUKMA of course. Everyone tries to make me feel better by saying, what will happen if you win a gold medal in SUKMA? It is a coveted achievement for every runner no doubt. But if your chance is gone, life goes on. With or without you - the ugly truth.

So here I am taking some time to thank God for allowing me to run in SUKMA two years ago. (Something I will never regret). I still don't know how I did it, SPM and SUKMA at the same time, but I know He is the reason. Now it is time to move forward, to greater heights. To look back and feel thankful, grateful and blessed. To look forward with optimistic hopes, expectations and excitement.

Remember that Genia.

---

You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.

―  C.S. Lewis

& his brilliant mind

27/05/2014

Okay so I know every post has a date but I couldn't think of a title. Anyway, for the first time ever a bunch of us got up at before 6am to "see the sunrise" in a park. Apparently it turned bright when we were on the way, but it was an accomplishment for us all kay. Anyway, we went for breakfast. The plan was to cycle in that park. Spent hours cycling and when we were all tired we went to a nearby mall afterwards to cool off. Finally got to have a decent chat with my best buds. Remising about high school days, oh those days. Feels good to be around the high school people again. Feels like school was just yesterday, oh well. Immensely grateful. Blessed.

Thankful for the time I have back home. I know things will be so different after everyone goes their separate ways, but if we can finish Pre-U and get back together, we can definitely graduate and meet up again, this I know.  

I must say it is good to be physically back! Today is an ultimate milestone - since my knee injury. Mom did not actually allow me to go back to doing stuff like these but I kinda ignored her. Surprisingly when I came home (in fact you can call it a miracle) she didn't stir things up. Samantha made me recompense for the time spent away from home that day - I had to mix frozen yoghurt for her to freeze. And some more yoghurt to eat. That cutie. Haha, anyway, back to mom. She just happily asked me to cook dinner (because she loves the way I cook the chicken fyi) hahaha. Also, I came home to new/replenished tea and pastry. Yes, my family are tea people. Tea is sacred, every flavour bought is someone's favourite.

 

Today was a really good day. :) :)

Everfound

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=laIzsL0waTQ

For all of your pain there’s a Father who hurts
For all of your hurt there’s a Healer who works
You’re never too far from his reach
So just believe, just believe

Choose wisely

It's getting cold

The walls feel icy, and voices echoes through the rooms. The air is stiff. You can feel it everywhere, tension building up.

When did it start to feel this way? When did everything become so bleak?

---

But He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.  That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

2 Corinthians 12:9-10

The Fault in Our Stars

"As he read, I fell in love the way you fall asleep: slowly, then all at once."

If you play this while reading reviews/thoughts of people on the book; get some tissues first. You will need it. I finished reading this short book in two nights. The only reason is because my heart couldn't take it. What a beautiful book. It is definitely one for instigating waterworks. If you know what I mean. I cannot say it is about love entirely. However it is a very thought provoking book. What an emotional read.

The love between Hazel and Augustus was so real. Frankly, I have never read something so intense (not including books abundant with those scenes), nothing like I have ever read before. But oh they way they thought in the book. Reflects the thoughts we ought to have. Because in the end we're all dying, cancer or no cancer. I shall leave you to ponder on whether or not you should read "The Fault in Our Stars", generally I don't agree to everything they say about the after life but I believe it opens minds. Thinking beyond living selfishly. With that, I have chosen beautiful pages of the book. So beautiful, I cannot...

---

"There are infinite numbers between 0 and 1. There's .1 and .12 and .112 and an infinite collection of others. Of course, there is a bigger infinite set of numbers between 0 and 2, or between 0 and a million. Some infinities are bigger than other infinities. A writer we used to like taught us that. There are days, many of them, when I resent the size of my unbounded set. I want more numbers than I'm likely to get, and God, I want more numbers for Augustus Waters than he got. But, Gus, my love, I cannot tell you how thankful I am for our little infinity. I wouldn't trade it for the world. You gave me a forever within the numbered days, and I'm grateful.”
―  Hazel Grace in The Fault in Our Stars

---

“I'm in love with you," he said quietly.

"Augustus," I said.

"I am," he said. He was staring at me, and I could see the corners of his eyes crinkling. "I'm in love with you, and I'm not in the business of denying myself the simple pleasure of saying true things. I'm in love with you, and I know that love is just a shout into the void, and that oblivion is inevitable, and that we're all doomed and that there will come a day when all our labor has been returned to dust, and I know the sun will swallow the only earth we'll ever have, and I am in love with you.”
"My thoughts are stars I cannot fathom into constellations.”
―  Augustus Waters in The Fault in Our Stars

Much to ponder upon. “I like my choices. I hope she likes hers.”

"Come here it’s all worth the fight when it’s you dear
We’re hitting our heads on the wall here, we don’t have to hold on so tightly

Slow down we’re losing the meaning of words now
quiet the noise cause we made a mountain of minuscule things"

Give up the Ghost, Rosi Golan

DAD

Today was a considerably important day for me - medically. My MRI scans were out, and I was freaking out to be honest. Yesterday, I was a mess. Suddenly felt the seriousness of the day and things became worse when we arrived in the hospital. We were a little bit late - and in these clinics seconds matter. We had to wait for hours, watching patients from everywhere, with illnesses varying. Freaked me out even more to see people with metal rods sticking out of gauze/casts. Yes, you can say I was pretty bottled up. A thousand thoughts were running through my mind. And when Dad brought up a sensitive topic over lunch (Yes we had that much time to wait), we kinda argued. It was quite bad and I.... broke down. Tears quietly spilled, in the cafeteria of a hospital. Unbelievable. But here is why I am telling you about my dad.

Throughout the whole ordeal he calmly and reassuringly repeated his point. At that time, I just cried, feeling surprised he didn't cave to say I was right, he didn't try to console me. He let me just cry. He told me sometimes you get emotional when you are stressed, but you should never let your emotions get a hold of you and cloud your rational judgements. When the tears stopped, I recollected myself and felt so relieved. Lightheaded. True enough, his point started to sound logical. The more he spoke, the more I understood what he meant. How did he know I needed to get those emotions out of my system? I felt a little foolish for instigating this argument initially.

Suddenly, his point actually sounded valid. Knowing myself - headstrong and all, I seriously felt surprised for feeling like that. It was not like I lost the argument in any way, I did not feel that way at all I just understood. Dad's unconditional love for mom. Knowing when and how to keep quiet when she rants. Knowing his place and judging accordingly. Knowing when to console me - or not to. Knowing how to make me feel better. Man, mom is so lucky to have him.

Despite his flaws and all I pray for a man just like my Dad in my life. I can only hope for so much, but Dad is amazing. He enjoys cooking, he fixes things, he cleans, he takes care of us in ways we never knew, he is always there and most of all he supports my dreams.

Turned out I am physically whole again. Nothing to worry about, a minor injury. I can go back to sports now - gradually of course.

I am blessed.

Nouveau départ

Hello everyone. I have decided that I do not want to constantly be reminded of all the low times - therefore no more sad posts or whatever. All good things are to be said only. Wow, in two days everything has escalated quickly. I need to tell everyone something. Well, I lost something quite important to me. And no, it is not the object or its value. It is about its meaning. Losing it gives my parents the liberty to bring it up anytime they want to call me irresponsible. I am literally giving them the green light to bring this occasion up in lectures and etc. I know they will never forget me losing something like that. But then, a though struck me. If my parents are God's representatives on earth and the authority He put us under, I bet they too will forgive and forget. Because I know they want the best for me. I hope this much is true. So many things to research by the way! Yet, here I am blogging. So many things to find out even more to anticipate. Ohkay, i've got this. My interview is just around the corner and I may be flying off in July already! I know I have always planned for these things to happen, but it is actually really happening. For real. Here is to new beginnings and hopefully more grace. Thank you God. ps/ interesting article. Read?

---

He makes my feet like the feet of a deer; He causes me to stand on the heights.  Psalms 18:33

#643

Hello all!

I just got accepted into a decent Uni. Yayers, so excited and happy. Finally feel a little bit secure of my future plans. Hope everything else goes well. These past few days... have been happening. Exhausted emotionally and physically. This morning's email for my acceptance really made my day. So, thanks God.

Also, today is a happy day for my bimbo. I have not done this in a long time but it is my best friend's birthday! So here is a post dedicated to her. Happy 19th birthday Qing Hua! I really hope you can read the writing behind the card. Really enjoyed making your card, I know you love it. Well, I hope you will receive cards every year on your birthday from me. (No matter how far away or where you are in the world) I am so happy to be here (finally, no MSSD, Kuching whatever) with you on your special day. And I hope that you will have a good one. Please stay safe in Penn State. I will miss you a lot but I am so grateful for your presence. You are my favourite bimbo and you should know that. Thanks for always hanging out with me. :)

---

Darling, just swear you'll stay, right by my side.

Be My Forever, Christina Perri ft. Ed Sheeran

It is the Lord who goes before you. He will be with you; He will not fail you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed.

Deuteronomy 31:8

Breathe in, breathe out

Tumblr has all the pretty pictures hehehe. Anyways. I went through a phase of cool Christian songs I found. But lately I realise I just skip 'em, today the playlist shuffled to a song thats somewhat so relevant. Ohgosh, I wish I know where I would be months from now. I wish I knew what is coming next for me. But He has that in store, and I am yet to find out. So many things at stake right now, I can't afford to drift away from God. Yet I find myself doing the exact thing. My only excuse is pathetic. Frankly, idk where I am right now.

So many things to do. So many things to learn. Interview to prepare for. All for the future. All I need is faith in it.  Sorry, I meant: faith in God, who holds future. Taking a step back to breathe in, breathe out.

---

I apologize to myself for living in the future

And letting what’s ahead get in the way
Because if happiness is always down the road
Then I'm missing it today.

-Breathe In, Breathe Out, The Afters

A mother is the truest friend we have, when trials heavy and sudden fall upon us; when adversity takes the place of prosperity; when friends desert us; when trouble thickens around us, still will she cling to us, and endeavour by her kind precepts and counsels to dissipate the clouds of darkness, and cause peace to return to our hearts.

Washington Irving

#636

Sleep leaves me tired.. I am so tired of being tired. But I had the best nap I've had in forever. So dream - free. Bliss. And when I spent nights awake not wanting to sleep I tend to read. Lately my sister has downloaded so many iBooks and honestly, some are crappy. But when I find a nice novel, it is nice. To escape reality, but then you wake up the next day and face life. Nevertheless books give me a break. And for that I must be thankful for its existence! They should have International Book day or something, lol. Okay bye. Exams tomorrow and then I get to go KL with Dad.

If I don't get a chance to say this, happy mothers day, to the beautiful women who raised us to be who we are today. Go hug your mom and tell her you love her. Hehe, God bless!

---

"I love books, I love the moment when you open one and sink into it you can escape from the world, into a story." Elizabeth Scott

#635 The Freedom Of Speech

Lately with all the buzz of social medias and individuals speaking up - my timelines and accounts have been bombarded with images, articles and viral videos. Everyone shares everything that angers them. For instance, a controversial issue like the equal rights in a country for all races often stirs everyone. Regardless of who they are, the social media has become a platform for individuals to express how they feel. And I have nothing against that, nothing at all. In fact I love reading the views expressed.

However, is there a limit? Yes, people need awareness of what is going on in the city, country or world. Friends need to know. Then again, the social media is what we have - something the government cannot control, or anyone else in fact. Hopefully we are wise enough to cherish this privilege we have. Hopefully people will take a moment to think and not be easily swayed by whatever they read. It is rather foolish to point fingers and accuse each other moments after these articles or videos go viral online. Also, what benefit is there to swear and curse on your profiles? Blaming the government will not (and may never) solve anything. Pray for them instead. Maybe they need more wisdom to solve these issues that concern us.

Honestly, I am a bit tired of seeing people saying too much online and not do anything in real life. Talking too much. Don't get me wrong labelling me as pro-government or whatever. But it doesn't apply to only that aspect. Another thing I despise most is when people share images of unfortunate people around the world. Instead of just merely sharing or reposting it, why not put a dollar in a jar? Every time you see an image of that kind add another dollar. That way you don't have to flood your timelines or profile with these pictures - on top of that you can save that money. And perhaps, when it is full donate it to a charity of your choice?

Maybe, just maybe, we can start swearing less online. Maybe, we should think before we write something that is in any way offensive to others. Maybe, we should think of ways we can actually contribute - to fix the mess. Then maybe, we can stop, listen and pray for the needs of the people around us.

 

---

"Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen."
Winston Churchill

Whatever you are, be a good one

Abraham Lincoln clearly disapproves of mediocrity, yet I wonder. Am I being a good one of whatever I am?

Again

[caption id="" align="aligncenter" width="500"] What does that mean?[/caption]

Have you ever woke up feeling like you have never slept at all. No matter how early you sleep, seven hours then nine or even ten. Yet, you wake up feeling tired - lethargic in fact. Have you woke up feeling that morning came too soon, and occasionally you get the chance to sleep in, but you wake up hours later feeling worse? Have you had endless dreams of running about in your mind all night?

Have you ever been robbed of your sleep?

 

---

 

Proverbs 3:24 (ESV)

If you lie down, you will not be afraid; when you lie down, your sleep will be sweet.

 

Hello Wordpress!

I've moved from blogger because so many of my pictures are deleted (due to the limited space available). Wordpress has 3 times more space so deal with me awhile. Thank you!

Psalms 62

NIV

For the director of music. For Jeduthun. A psalm of David.

1 Truly my soul finds rest in God;

    my salvation comes from Him.

2 Truly He is my rock and my salvation;

    He is my fortress, I will never be shaken.

3 How long will you assault me?

    Would all of you throw me down—

    this leaning wall, this tottering fence?

4 Surely they intend to topple me

    from my lofty place;

    they take delight in lies.

With their mouths they bless,

    but in their hearts they curse.

5 Yes, my soul, find rest in God;

    my hope comes from him.

6 Truly He is my rock and my salvation;

    He is my fortress, I will not be shaken.

7 My salvation and my honor depend on God;

    He is my mighty rock, my refuge.

8 Trust in Him at all times, you people;

    pour out your hearts to him,

    for God is our refuge.

9 Surely the lowborn are but a breath,

    the highborn are but a lie.

If weighed on a balance, they are nothing;

    together they are only a breath.

10 Do not trust in extortion

    or put vain hope in stolen goods;

though your riches increase,

    do not set your heart on them.

11 One thing God has spoken,

    two things I have heard:

“Power belongs to you, God,

12     and with you, Lord, is unfailing love”;

and, “You reward everyone

    according to what they have done.”

Psalms 62

NIV

For the director of music. For Jeduthun. A psalm of David.

1 Truly my soul finds rest in God;

    my salvation comes from Him.

2 Truly He is my rock and my salvation;

    He is my fortress, I will never be shaken.

3 How long will you assault me?

    Would all of you throw me down—

    this leaning wall, this tottering fence?

4 Surely they intend to topple me

    from my lofty place;

    they take delight in lies.

With their mouths they bless,

    but in their hearts they curse.

5 Yes, my soul, find rest in God;

    my hope comes from him.

6 Truly He is my rock and my salvation;

    He is my fortress, I will not be shaken.

7 My salvation and my honor depend on God;

    He is my mighty rock, my refuge.

8 Trust in Him at all times, you people;

    pour out your hearts to him,

    for God is our refuge.

9 Surely the lowborn are but a breath,

    the highborn are but a lie.

If weighed on a balance, they are nothing;

    together they are only a breath.

10 Do not trust in extortion

    or put vain hope in stolen goods;

though your riches increase,

    do not set your heart on them.

11 One thing God has spoken,

    two things I have heard:

“Power belongs to you, God,

12     and with you, Lord, is unfailing love”;

and, “You reward everyone

    according to what they have done.”

#631

Credits

I have to say my vulnerability to cry over sad movies, bad news or something worse - its almost gone. I am so numb.

#631

Credits

I have to say my vulnerability to cry over sad movies, bad news or something worse - its almost gone. I am so numb.

#630

After being out of high school (which felt like a lifetime) I finally met up with them guys. Best seniors - the ones that will drive all the way to Kuala Selangor just to watch the race. Turns out they're all doing so well, such fine men already! So good to see how much we've all been through - how far we've come.

Haha okay sentimental much, but oh man talking about MSSD & MSSS etc makes me miss those care free times so much. Was the best season of my life where school and training was pretty much my life.


Time to grow up.

#630

After being out of high school (which felt like a lifetime) I finally met up with them guys. Best seniors - the ones that will drive all the way to Kuala Selangor just to watch the race. Turns out they're all doing so well, such fine men already! So good to see how much we've all been through - how far we've come.

Haha okay sentimental much, but oh man talking about MSSD & MSSS etc makes me miss those care free times so much. Was the best season of my life where school and training was pretty much my life.


Time to grow up.

Psalm 39:4

"Show me, LORD, my life's end and the number of my days; let me know how fleeting my life is."

Because every sunrise is a blessing; credits

Just 2 years ago I had to say goodbye to a very dear friend. I wouldn't exactly claim to be his closest buddy but he was the nicest guy with the best intentions. Up till the very last meeting we had. Today, one of my church friend's brother passed on in a car accident early this morning. I do not know him very well but I knew his brother. He was co-leading a games group in camp with me. Like the psalmist David says, teach us to number our days. Life is too short.

We were given the privilege to live each day we wake up, what are we living for?

I hope my answer is Jesus. Because He is everything and He means everything.

RIP Samuel Joshua Cruz

Psalm 39:4

"Show me, LORD, my life's end and the number of my days; let me know how fleeting my life is."

Because every sunrise is a blessing; credits

Just 2 years ago I had to say goodbye to a very dear friend. I wouldn't exactly claim to be his closest buddy but he was the nicest guy with the best intentions. Up till the very last meeting we had. Today, one of my church friend's brother passed on in a car accident early this morning. I do not know him very well but I knew his brother. He was co-leading a games group in camp with me. Like the psalmist David says, teach us to number our days. Life is too short.

We were given the privilege to live each day we wake up, what are we living for?

I hope my answer is Jesus. Because He is everything and He means everything.

RIP Samuel Joshua Cruz